Healing as a Martial Art
Healing does not always look sexy. Much like the path of martial arts, the healing process is often a journey of blood, sweat, and tears. While there are moments of profundity and deep growth, the day-to-day can feel more like a grind than an “A-ha!” moment. When viewed through the lens of martial arts training, healing can be understood as an ongoing practice that requires dedication and perseverance; the result of which cultivates the mindstate of an artist. An artist is always learning, practicing, and progressing towards a never-ending horizon. It is a lifestyle more than it is a destination, and it requires deep respect and commitment to the craft.
The path of healing typically starts with a decision to step towards change. Ask any martial artist about the first day stepping into the training center and most will admit, you are immediately confronted with your fears and limitations. Witnessing the levels of competence around you, you can become fearful and plagued by comparisons. You may get cold feet and try to avoid the vulnerability of accepting yourself a beginner. These are the first hurdles of the healing process. How deeply are you committed to change? Can you cultivate the will to continue despite the insecurities you feel? Can you trust the process and say yes to the vulnerability?
If so, you receive the first gift; humility. Nobody heals or grows without this step. We must know and respect our limitations to be in a position to receive help. In any martial art, arriving as a know-it-all will quickly result in tension and conflict. You will likely get hurt or hurt someone else. You can not fill a cup that is already full, and the process of emptying one’s cup and accepting teachings is a profound step of letting go and surrendering.
Upon accepting our limitations and opening to the help, we can then identify a teacher or coach to assist the process. It is important to find someone that understands our goals and intentions. Because we are in the act of surrender, we are inherently vulnerable. It takes time, communication, and intuition to find the right fit. Often times, you may need to shop around until you receive an internal “yes” that you have landed in the right place.
Once we find a teacher or coach, the early stages of learning will likely bring up our pride, ego, and trust issues. These are the next barriers to our growth. How deeply can I trust myself? How deeply can I trust another? Can I listen and learn? Am I willing to accept guidance and practice what is offered?
If we say yes, we receive the next gift; guidance. An inexperienced martial artist cannot manifest technique without proper modeling and teaching. Similarly, healing our core wounds requires mirroring and offerings from someone who see’s the wider picture and has experience guiding individuals through the forest. A strong guide will help us cultivate the tools necessary for growth, and will support us through impasses and challenges as they arise.
As we receive guidance, the next test is that of out investment. Whether it be to martial arts technique, or techniques of self-awareness and compassion, the investment is both physical and emotional. We must show up and put in the work. A martial artist who trains one time a week will not progress like the martial artist who shows up multiple times a week and practices at home. Our dedication and commitment often predicts our outcomes. This is yet another space to explore barriers. Are we truly ready to grow? Do we still believe in ourselves? Are we prioritizing other things? If so, what else is taking our attention and why?
We are now beginning to walk the path. As we invest our time and energy, it is common to expect quick results. We may witness others who progress more rapidly than we do. We may also compare ourselves to others who appear to have a more natural ability to learn and grow. These are additional barriers to test our will and dedication. A well-trained teacher will remind us that there is no set timeline. Learning to accept our personal process will save us a lot of grief, and will provide compassion when we become hard on ourselves and wish our path looked different. At times we move slow and steady. At other times, we push through. We learn to attune to the process and know when to lean in, and when to let go.
Unfortunately on this journey, many will give up. Perhaps things are not moving fast enough. It may feel too challenging or exhausting to do the work. Perhaps we are confronted with limiting beliefs that feel too difficult to overcome.
Others will see quick progress, but retreat back into comfort behaviors because the novelty of change and growth is uncertain and scary. Some will see small changes and accept that as the limit. But those who believe and commit themselves to the practices will adopt a new attitude and perspective on life. They will accept the artistry of being on a healing journey and it will begin to create a physical, emotional, and even spiritual shift. They will dedicate themselves to the art of healing.
Things we couldn’t do on day one will suddenly arise intuitively and with ease. Our relationship to fear will begin to change as we build a sense of confidence and competence. While we can look forward and see a long path ahead of us, we can also look back and recognize the changes that are occurring. A healthy pride develops at each step of progress. New hurdles will be welcomed as an opportunity for growth. Instead of avoidance, we will find ourselves purposefully stepping into more challenging territory. Whether it be taking on a martial arts fight or competition, or engaging relationships in a new and deeper way, we will begin to push our edges and challenge ourselves on purpose. Things that felt impossible day one will now feel like options. The possibilities start to feel endless.
In accepting the healing journey as a path similar to martial arts, we are saying yes to the entirety of the process. The blood, sweat, and tears are inseparable from the moments of growth, clarity, and strength that arise. In continuing the path, we learn that there are characteristics to cultivate that assist the journey.
Perseverance- In martial arts training, there are many obstacles. Whether it be injuries or new techniques that require increased skill or flexibility, there is an attitude of perseverance that is developed. You keep placing one foot in front of the other, despite the barrier you face. When things get difficult, you keep showing up. You train the basics and stay steadfast.
Discipline- Healing and martial arts are often wars of attrition. Your will will get tested and you will experience resistance. Committing to the discipline of your training will carry you through the challenging moments. The mind is consistently looking for outs, and we must counter this with an unwavering integrity and dedication to the craft. Routines become the cornerstones of our new lifestyle.
Rest- Perseverance, discipline, and training requires a lot of energy. Rest becomes an imperative part of the practice. Self-care is key and we must attune to our system and know when we need to pump the breaks. Perhaps the biggest shadow in the martial arts is over-training due to insecurity. Rest requires trust and confidence. This act of self-care can take many forms but should ultimately refresh and rejuvenate us, and remind us that our body deserves full love and attention.
Community- Going it alone is much harder than growing with a tribe. Community provides inspiration, motivation, and additional guidance on the path. A martial artist is only as good as their training partners. The same can be said of healing. The depth we are able to attain is often time mirrored by the depth of our relationships. Choosing a strong community will aid our journey and help us create intimate friendships along the way.
With these ingredients, the path of healing takes shape into a true martial art. We are on a journey that has no end point, but instead instills an attitude of saying “yes” to the work and growth that is constantly available. We let go of the concept of a destination and instead view healing as a lifestyle choice. We persevere, practice discipline, rest, and engage deeply with our community. Over time we may notice that the fight is never with an outside opponent, rather with our own self-limiting beliefs. How deep can we go? The answer to that question is only earned by taking the first step.
What is your first step?
