Will Life Be Different After Coronavirus? What Addiction Recovery Can Teach Us About Change

“Life will be different after this. There is no way we will return to the way it was.” I have seen this sentiment shared endlessly on social media. While I hope it to be true, addiction professionals hear this statement daily and watch it get unproven time and time again. Rock bottoms do not guarantee change. Perhaps addiction recovery has a lot to teach us about change.

After choosing a path of short-term relief and coping through substance use, there comes a time where the backlog of negative consequences inevitably catches up to us. Because addictive lifestyles are inherently unsustainable, we must eventually face the truth and consequences of our addictions. Often referred to as a “rock bottom,” this moment is characterized by severe physical and mental health issues, legal trouble, relationship damage, and gut-wrenching guilt and shame.

This moment forces us to seek help, take refuge, and end the cycle of addictive use that is perpetuating the negative cycle. More times than not, this requires medical, legal, and psychological intervention. Stopping it on our own is borderline impossible. It typically takes drastic consequences to force a wake up.

In the period of initial treatment and recovery, the first days are a shock to the system. Acute withdrawal ravages the body and mind, sending us into a spiral of negative symptoms. Time is distorted. Mood is unpredictable. We feel lost, afraid, and naked. Many times, we will retreat into other negative forms of coping.

In these early stages, an individual in recovery will reflect on their unsustainable lifestyle and often feel revulsion. There is clarity around how damaging the lifestyle was. But there is also longing. The momentum of addictive use creates a pattern that is hard to redirect. There is a battle between the idea of a new path, and the pleasures and comfort of the past. Despite the clear negative consequences of the addiction, the thought of something new can at times feel terrifying.

If the commitment to change remains, the acute symptoms begin to ware off and the new state of sobriety begins to feel promising. There is relief to be dis-attached from the addictive use. Hope begins to emerge. There is promise of a new life. These moments are often called the “pink cloud,” representing an important but naive confidence in the path ahead.

In this state, addiction professionals will hear the same thing. “I will never go back. This is my wake up. Now I know what my addiction will do to me, and that will prevent me from ever choosing this road again.”

An untrained professional will reinforce and buy-in to these statements. An experienced professional will challenge the confidence and bravado. It is easy to make declarations about one’s future in a time where you are safe and disengaged from your previous lifestyle. The real examination of one’s commitment is shown by how they show up day to day. What practices and skills are you building? What support are you creating? How are you aligning plans for when you return to life? Are you doing the work, or just enjoying a break?

Statistics vary, but following residential treatment, close to 80% of individuals in recovery will relapse. Of those 80%, the vast majority will require a second, third, or fourth inpatient treatment. As one accrues residential treatment stays, they will learn a valuable lesson. This is war, and your addiction has quite the artillery. To assume this will be easy will be your greatest mistake. To assume negative consequences outweigh the momentum of your addiction is naive and deadly. True recovery requires commitment, support, and unwavering vigilance. Without this, you will lose. And you will lose again and again.

The path of recovery should serve as a powerful analogy for the time we are in. Most people wish for this moment to serve as our rock bottom, our wake up. It certainly can be just that. But as anyone in recovery will teach you, a rock bottom does not guarantee change, especially if you wish for it to do all the work for you. Your addictions and your old life has momentum, and you are vulnerable. You will need to meet this catalyst with your own power, will, and determination. Without those components, you will repeat history.

The individuals that succeed in creating a new life often carry a set of characteristics that should be noted. They understand that this will not be easy, and they prepare thoroughly for the challenges ahead. While in treatment (quarantine), they are actively doing the work to create new habits and patterns for when they return. They do not treat it as a “vacation.” They create support systems to maintain accountability. They ask for help, and they display humility and willingness. They know that this is an opportunity that will quickly be squandered if they lose vigilance.

This is sacred time, a true catalyst for lasting change. But change is not guaranteed. As anyone in recovery will tell you, relapse is a part of recovery and the rock bottoms will only get worse. The emotional impact of having to start again takes a toll on one’s spirit and will, and we only get a handful of these opportunities. We must take advantage of the time we are in and examine how we are showing up. Are we on vacation, or are we doing the work to initiate lasting change? Be honest with yourself.